I currently have no income, in spite of me being employed by grocery store company (as it stands). Their excuse for no longer scheduling me is that it is now slower at the store in terms of patronage and they have little hours to spare, even though that contradicts the business they actually receive as well as the hours they have available. With that in mind, the cutting of my hours into nothing occurred after I had gone to the ER due to suicidal ideation brought on by having night terrors related to my sexual assault(s). I made the mistake of explicitly telling one of my 4 managers that I was going in for suicidal ideation (albeit, I only used the clinical “ideation” as to avoid saying outright, “I want to kill myself, and I need to be in the ER.”), and…well, I’m suspicious as to why they suddenly cut my hours into nothing.
For further background/context: I have been professionally diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Persistent Depressive Disorder (or Dysthymia), and Complex-PTSD. I have had a history of outpatient care for the better part of a decade. I have participated in psychotherapy and was prescribed an SSRI to combat my emotional irregularities. In spite of my mental illnesses, I have held down a job, prior to my current one, for nearly six years before my mental health reached such a low point that I was terminated for attendance issues.
Continuing on with the main focus of the post; because I have no feasible income, I am dangerously behind on my rent, and though I managed to pay my bills last month; that was last month, and bills don’t stop…I also need household items. Sanitary items, cat food/litter for my therapy animal, and toiletries. While Shura, the aforementioned therapy animal, currently has all her necessities, it’s only a matter of time before things run out.
I have asked my case manager about government aid (it was my absolute last want to essentially beg for help online to thousands of strangers, everyone bearing witness to my failings). I can only receive aid with my rent when I am served an eviction notice, it is not a preventative. The companies I go through for Internet and electricity mainly focus on pardoning families, not single adults; and, unfortunately, having a cellphone/telephone isn’t seen as important as these other concerns so there is no aid for it all together. Rightly so, I suppose, however I do need my cellphone as I want to begin looking for another job again.
This is a large sum to require, I understand, but…it’s what I need. 600 dollars is what I will need. As previously stated, I am behind on rent, and majority of the money has to go into paying that off so I am not evicted.
If I reach this lofty goal of mine, I will say so and request people stop sending; and if you happen to after the goal has been reached, I will return your money. Even if you can’t give anything, a reblog is more than enough.
bro imagine if it was reverse for cesar and mark. like Mark calls cesar over but cesar knows he shouldn't need help because he has a gun and family with him, and the police won't go and check his house. cut to a time where cesars shopping or something and he just sees alt!mark staring him down
Poor soft prep boi would be terrified... Cesar definitely would try to find every excuse under the sun to not be left alone with Mark...though...that doesn't always work out...
(Also, it's amazing how just changing Cesar's eye shape makes him look more innocent xD)
Having midnight thoughts about that Mandela Catalogue Jekyll/Hyde AU:
-Alternates are humans that have been possessed by/merged with their demonic counterpart. When separated, this counterpart cannot be seen by anyone other than their human.
-Just like in canon, these demons use psychological warfare to try and torment their humans. If the human's mind reaches a weak enough state (or if the human dies), then the demon can possess their body--thus creating an alternate.
-Cesar (of course) became of victim of his demonic counterpart. However, something happened to where Cesar was able to retain his humanity. With that said, there are instances where Cesar becomes more like an alternate in behavior and appearance. It usually happens when he's angry. It also tends to happen at night (cuz ooo, spookyyyy)
-On that note, he'll sometimes get strange urges to do horrible things. There is a specific voice he keeps hearing...it sounds calm...soothing...angelic.
-Cesar is aware of what has happened to him and oof. He does not tell Mark about it. He feels guilty about keeping it a secret, but he also can't bring himself to say that he's become a monster.
-Mark eventually finds out via Cesar protecting him against an alternate. Cue the two of them working together to find a cure and also a way to stop the alternates from taking over their county completely.
-Cesar definitely has conversations with his "alt-self" in the mirror/in his dreams from time to time
Those are just some ideas I have! If you have any as well, I'd love to hear 'em ^.^
Aww, now they can go on twisted adventures together and terrorize the rest of the town :')
Based on the idea that alternates /are/ their non-alternate counterpart, just corrupted/possessed by some evil in some way after death.
(Though, I do wonder what Mark would look like in a suit--specifically the one Cesar's wearing xD)
I love the idea of a Jekyll-Hyde scenario with Cesar and Alt!Cesar. Going back to the "shit i made friends with my bestie's alternate" I imagine Alt!Cesar forming an attatchment to Mark, to the point he will take over Cesar the moment Mark's life gets threatened. Overprotective Alternate Friend? Hell yeah.
Yeesssssssss!!! I can see another alternate tormenting Mark and Alt!Cesar immediately steps in. This would be the first time Mark sees Cesar's alternate form. Cue Mark confronting Cesar afterwards: "You're one of them?!"
Now Cesar's got some 'splaining to do xD
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