Nobody that watches my main channel looks on here probably but I just wanna say that I'm gonna take a break from youtube on both my channels until mid-June (the end of high school for me) to get my mental health in check. Making videos on a schedule contributed to my stress.
#update #kinda vent? #mak's rambles #yeah something's been hitting me hard the past few days #i pretty much have next week off i think so hopefully that'll help #but after next week it's gonna be stressful
Call me uncultured or a downer or whatever but I really don't get why prom is such a big deal.
I mean if you went/go to a good school then I can understand. But mine has stoners and someone gets into a fight once a week. I'm kinda convinced that someone's gonna sneak some sort of drug or alcohol in. Not to mention that the tickets for students are $65 and $70 for guests.
#that's funny #oh and something I forgot to include is the fucking prom monarch shit #it's basically a popularity contest and it's normally the brat of the grade that gets it #idk and idc who it was though
No one is concerned about kids not “understanding”. They’re just afraid of their kids being queer. And more than that, they’re appealing to the fears of their voter base, regardless of whether or not they care about the issue.
I finally gathered enough motivation to make GS!Cluster's design instead of thinking about it in my head for the longest time. I have a ref for them but it doesn't say much.
So here: Can terraform, teleport, and has high senses and strength. About 4,500ish years old. They/it pronouns. Their eye is covered most of the time due to sensory issues.
YES pineapples contain an enzyme that literally dissolves the top layer of the inside of your mouth. NO, most people aren’t able to actually taste that happening
much respect to the people in the notes going “i have learned something new about myself today, but i am going to continuing eating and enjoying my itchy spicy danger food”
I hate to break it to you bud but citrus isn’t supposed to hurt either. it’s sour, so you might not like it the same way some people don’t like bitter flavors, but it’s not painful unless you get it on a cut or something. if citrus is painful for you to eat then you should probably stop eating citrus.
I brought this to shame @coffee-mage-sans-caffeine for their tingly numb making kiwi habit and in doing so discovered that they find citrus peel “spicy” and ouchy
I swear on all that is unholy I’m gonna bypass the fruit queue and just murder them myself while I’m at it
Sometimes it’s not allergies, sometimes it’s sensory sensitivity, especially with cinnamon.
Cinnamon is actually spicy, just usually not at the amounts that we put into food here in the west: cinnamaldehyde activates the “hot” feeling in nerves, just way way way WAY way less severely than capsaicin. Mostly the amount that we put in baking isn’t enough to feel “hot” to most adults, just enough to flavour, but it really depends.
Excessive hotness/tingling might be a sign of allergy, but it might also just be a sign of sensory sensitivity.
This is especially the case if you also find mint “bitey” tasting to an unpleasant extent, or dislike carbonated beverages because they hurt your mouth. It can also be the same for “sour” acids.
Foods that actually contain substances that are spicy/hot:
- Chillies/peppers (capsaicin)
–> if you are sensitive enough, even “sweet” peppers contain capsinoids which may taste spicy to you
- Radishes and wasabi (allyl isothiocyanates)
- Mustards (also allyl isothiocyanates)
- Cinnamon (cinnamaldehyde)
- Cloves (eugenol, which will also make your mouth numb)
- Uzazi and szechuan peppers (hydroxy-alpha-sanshool)
- Peppercorns (piperine)
- Ginger (gingerol)
There are probably others. Like yes “spicy banana” is absolutely a histamine response! But especially if it’s actually a spice, there is probably something in it universally agreed to be spicy (in enough quantity).
Thank you to this post for making me notice I was starting to develop an allergy to bananas. Boo to my dad’s genetics for being the probably culprit for the banana allergy, because I like bananas
@deluxeyellowflower very helpful tags! (formatted for clarity)
i have oral allergy syndrome, and supposedly if you have it you should be able to eat those fruits just fine if you microwave them. the enzymes your body is reacting to is incredibly weak. so if you didn’t have fruit allergies when you were a kid but did have really bad pollen allergies and then started to get a reaction to certain fruits (but only when they are raw, again a quick shot in the microwave or cooking it will break the enzymes) then you might have oral allergy syndrome. you always want to be careful of things you’re allergic to, and if you have any allergy that makes your throat itchy you should avoid it and consider getting an epipen if you can. it is very common for food allergies that are “mild" to progress very quickly to becoming not mild. and anything that impacts your throat you do not want to progress into something worse.
#I have some sensory issues with food but moreso with texture #but yeah #some foods aren't supposed to be spicy #for example I'm allergic to pineapple #to me it tastes spicy and burns my mouth #that's how I found out I'm allergic #long post
Redid the reference sheet and design for this character.
Here's him just on his own w/o the reference junk.
#I'm using the pagan symbol for air because it was originally associated with Akira (the protag of Tornadic) #in that shitty EAS scenario I made that everyone loved #Also I could give less of a fuck about my characters' sexualities #because it doesn't matter #but it's there because I don't want people making ships if a character is (for example) aroace #original character#redesign#story#digital art #might change the symbol for Tornadic to a tornado ngl #would make more sense
Here I am again.
I need treatment again.
I never expected my half-life to be so short.
Break my heart and restart it again.
Try 6 mg.
Flush it out of my system.
That didn't work? Try 12.
Maybe doing the same thing over and over again will fix me.
No, my heart refuses to fix itself.
30 is the highest you can go, but why not try 40?
Why not stop my heart… forever?
#really shitty poem #I'm bad at poems but I felt like writing one #for context: adenosine is a drug that stops the heart for 7-20 seconds and restarts it again #it's intended to fix tachyarrhythmias #however this poem is about being forced to live with trauma even after numerous suicide attempts #and desperately trying to convince yourself that people want you around despite your mind telling you no #this is half-vent half 'i just wanted to do this because i can' #moreso the latter #might delete later
This is the first character design for my SU AU: Lapis. She reforms earlier than canonically.
#GS!Lapis #Gem Shards #steven universe au #lapis lazuli#digital art #I drew the back part kinda bad buuuut yes the star is on the back #next is the cluster because fuck #something bad finna happen if I don't get its design down #<- /j
#black capped chickadee #bird#photography#southeast virginia #again picture quality is kinda poo #bc camera#birdwatching#birding #except the one on the left in the bottom picture is something else i think #i love these birds #they're like me: small and kinda an asshole
For Goretober this year I'm kinda thinking about doing a small psychological horror-themed writing prompt a day rather than a drawing.
#i was able to keep up on drawings last year but there were some days where I had to do 2 in a day #...which I might do again this year #phooey #yes I know it's only May no I don't care #whether I decide to do drawings or writing though it'll be psychological horror themed no matter what
Mother's Day can be a painful reminder, so here's a salute to all the kids and adult children who grew up with absent mothers, angry mothers, negligent mothers, abusive mothers, overly-critical mothers, codependent mothers, overwhelmed and struggling mothers, mothers who ignored your cries for help, mothers who sacrificed your happiness to placate others, mothers who tried to do better but failed, and mothers who didn't try quite hard enough.
And to every child and adult who has a complicated relationship with their mother or caretaker--it's okay to feel conflicted. It's okay to feel hurt and love and resentment and pain and sympathy and longing and guilt bundled up into one big tangled ball. It's okay to struggle to reconcile the bad memories with the good ones that simultaneously exist. It's okay to be angry about the ways your parent failed you, and also aware of their personal struggles, and the way their parents in turn failed them. It's okay to recognize that you were loved but also that you were treated unfairly, unkindly. Contradictions are the natural state of the world. Multiple truths coexist. It's okay to be conflicted.
Parents are humans. Human relationships are complicated, and cannot be summarized by a greeting card. Wherever you are coming from, I hope your future holds healing and love, love, love.
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