Listen. I understand. Not every fic can feature horses, especially modern AUs. But you still want to include Roach, of course, she's wonderful. So you make Roach a cat in your fic, which, wonderful, but
Please know this is what my mind does every time you say "Roach jumped on the couch and started purring"
#Asdfghjkl #I cannot help it #It's even worse when it's Roach perched on jaskiers shoulders #Jaskier #I just see a bards legs sticking out from underneath a horse #I'm not saying change it #In fact I'm actively against that Roach as a cat is great #But brain says Roach equals horse #Witcher#Fanfic#Roach #The witcher 3 #The Witcher
i’ve done a good deal of funny high!jask for veritas, and i did one of a scary trip, but i kind of want to do one where jask is NOT having a good trip, but the trip itself is objectively funny
just jaskier starfished on the floor, with geralt like ‘c’mon, jask. let’s go to bed.’
jaskier, very serious, eyes massive: ‘geralt i think gravity is picking on me, specifically. watch.’ *absolutely no movement* ‘did you SEE THAT I TRIED TO PICK UP MY ARM AND GRAVITY STOPPED ME’
#jaskier *sniffly weeping looking absolutely pathetic* 'geralt i can no longer eat food. geralt i have to photosynthesize like grass' #geralt *trying DESPERATELY to be a good partner but C'MON this is objectively peak comedy* '...hm' #'geralt i can barely taste the sunlight off of the moon how will i ever be full' #jaskier *actively weeping* 'geralt roach is now going to EAT ME' #geralt doing the poker face of his LIFE: 'no she-' #*roach whinnies bc she heard her name* #jaskier: SCREAMING
In celebration of the last prompt yet to be filled for Flufftober 2021, instead of writing a new fic for 'against the wall kiss', I have decided to make a post sharing all of my fics that I use this move in (and you'll see I'm a big fan of this move)!
To read on A03, simply click the underlined title. Please heed the ratings (everything is M and up) and tags, these get steamy!
Fandom/Pairing: SEAL Team, Trent Sawyer/Clay Spenser
Summary: Trent and Clay have a surprise visitor interrupt their night-time activities....
Title: Heat Rising
Fandom/Pairing: SWAT/911, Jim Street/Buck
Summary: AKA 5 + 1 Ways that the 20-David Squad Found Out that Jim was Dating a Firefighter and the One Time He Wasn’t
Title: Alternate Birthday Plans
Fandom/Pairing: RNM, Malex
Summary: Alex wonders why Guerin is taking him to one of the sketchier motels on the outskirts of Roswell.
This one counts for two times and you’ll see why if you read it!
Title: Your Hands, My Ghosts
Fandom/Pairing: Call of Duty, Roach/Ghost
Summary: As Simon and Gary’s relationship starts to heat up, Simon’s memories as a prisoner of war come back to haunt him.
Against a jeep door:
Title: Now You're All I Want
Fandom/Pairing: 911, Buddie
Summary: Eddie never makes the first move, Buck knows this all too well.
Against the wall...other activities (below the cut)!
Title: Super Soldiers Are Heavy
Fandom/Pairing: TFATWS, Sam/Bucky
Summary: Bucky gets hurt on a mission, Sam has to get him to their exfil in one piece.
Title: Call Me By Your Name
Fandom/Pairing: SEAL Team, Trent Sawyer/Clay Spenser
Summary: Clay and Trent attempt to have a quickie in a storage closet while avoiding detection from the rest of Bravo team. Is their mission successful?
Title: Three Cuddles and a F****
Fandom/Pairing: TFATWS/Daredevil, Matt/Bucky (Winterdevil)
Summary: AKA the three times their friends came across Matt and Bucky cuddling and the one time it was more...
When drips of blood grow smaller as the trail progresses, they’re probably not coming from a wound. They might be dripping from the animal’s fur, or a murderer’s blade. If the size of the drips remains constant—a “replenishing trail”—they are likely coming from an “active bleeder.” A smear of blood is a “contact pattern,” perhaps a place where the victim fell or placed a bloody hand.
"Yes actually! Give me almost anything to eat and I'll convert it into my flammable ichor!~ Best type of fuel you can find!!~"
Make their job easier! Put it into your cars, put it into your homes and businesses! Let it warm your farm animals, let it warm your sick! Let it power your planes! Power your ships! The demon wants to watch their flesh corruption go far!
#active roache#anonymous #Bor: My ichor isn't dangerous! #Bor @ the government: *gives them something that acts like their ichor but it's really their plague AND THEY START PLAYING PLAGUE INC*
obsessed with tumblrs notification system!! I just got an email about a starter someone made for me in an old rpc!! I was very confused!! the blog was a -blog so definitely inactive!! I went and looked!! the starter is from five full years ago!! I love this website why would I ever go anywhere else!!
#⌬ — alien roach stan 2021 ❜ ( re : ooc ) #I was really like damn somebody has a queue long enough to have a starter for me?? #in a fandom I haven’t been active in since 2020?? #never seen this starter before in my LIFE I’m OBSESSED
okay but geraskier who DON’T easily fall back into traveling together because there are things you forget when you don’t use them for a while, and there’s still SO many things not discussed between them
someone buys a flavor of bun the other person hates bc they weren’t thinking about it. there’s an awkward shuffle now when getting into a shared bed bc the practice of it is lost. jaskier can’t remember which potion he should hand geralt bc he doesn’t know which order geralt keeps them in now. geralt pushes too far one day bc he’d let ciri ride so much he’s not as focused anymore on keeping track of distance for the sake of a walking human.
just the entire process of having to relearn each other, and the way it would hurt to HAVE to in the first place.
#geraskier#geralt#jaskier #i'm just thinking of the time i bought my friend earrings bc i hadn't seen her in over a year #and forgot her ears weren't pierced #just the little things that show you 'oh there's distance here now' #where there wasn't before #bc if you don't use it you lose #and also i'd bet they were trying NOT to think about each other which makes it worse #just the hurt of those details fading #having to relearn things you never thought you'd forget #jaskier goes to order something for supper for them one day #and can't remember if it's pig or goat geralt doesn't like in a stew #oh man even the things CONSCIOUSLY lost #jaskier suddenly keeping his hands to himself so he wont' cross boundaries #geralt not teasing as much bc jask smells like hurts sometimes without geralt knowing WHY and he doesn't wanna make it worse #even just in sharing space with someone #jaskier suddenly religious about keeping all of his stuff separate #where before he'd actively try to stuff things into geralt's bags so he wouldn't have to carry them #oh man even roach #jaskier forgets something like 'this buckle two holes down this one four' and accidentally saddles her wrong #bc he's out of practice at it and has forgotten #when he used to be able to do it with his eyes shut #pen posts
The swamp waters bubble and ripple as gloved fingers and limbs finally return to the surface -- a suited cycloptic cyborg ascends back to the earth after a seemingly eternal fugue state. The coughing engine of glittering glass and plastic deliriously assesses his surroundings, gagging on the compacted sludge in his ruined lungs.
They listen to the struggle of the cyclops, they'd help but they know sometimes things getting out of the swamp might lash out. By whatever means too... And here they are thinking it'd be a normal day in the swamp picking herbs and mushrooms.
Bor was worried if this emergence is taking a toll on the fella, waiting for a cough, waiting for any signs of... Well, fluid was expelled out of his body. The cough certainly brought them a smile! This is good!
"Ah, Ciao! Welcome to the living plane, pal.~ I got just a place for you to dry off, that's if you care to follow."
No wonder he was hearing little chitter chatters on the floor. Seemed like they were having a fine debating sess so hoped the fellas won't mind if he scoot all down to join them.
"Care to retell me on what you dearies were talking about~?"
"Oh! It's just a dispute about nymphs eating things they shouldn't and other roaches not respecting the territorial boundaries of the termites. Leader stuff ya know.~"
the demon won't go on to much explanation than that but they did scuttle on top of Sterling as a vantage point to see the other roaches and hear them out. Just another day with the intrusion~
There's a strong smell of carrion nearby. Thousands of flies screaming around what looks like a rotting fallen log along with littered colonies of decomposers. If investigated, it turns out the log is actually a corpse that's been disemboweled! It's unrecognizable besides being extremely large. Within the gore, there looks to be a collection of small pearls. Some shattered and covered in an embryonic ooze. It looks like there's one pearl in tact. Do you take it or leave it?
Of course, such a strong smell of carrion is gonna lure this demon in, diving in regardless if there are already other decomposers present already. Mainly with how big this thing is, they wouldn't wanna miss this! Their tongue tapping away for a suitable spot to dive their inner mouth right into the flesh, keeping their head high make sure to watch their own back while they feed!
Besides the loud buzzing of flies, the soft slurping of decaying flesh of their own, and other scavengers sharing a meal-... Everything seemed calm for now, they start preoccupying taking some of this to the fodder pits, maybe all?? who knows! It could be useful! While they dug around their hand fell onto something... Crunchy... Feeding stopped to a halt, slowly lifted up a little to feel what it is... Shells?? Glass?? Bor removed their inner mouth from the first feeding spot and closer to this one. While they nosh they continued to feel around on this spot and noticed one of these crunchy bits aren't broken, round even!
They slorped up the remaining food in that one-track gut including their mouth right back where it should be. Picking up the sphere with both hands and giving it a look-see...
It's... Really shiny... Hmm, they're definitely keeping this, maybe they can make a cool jewelry piece for a giant down at J.W.'s forest from it. And they're keeping half of the carrion too! They buzzed their wings to a deep deep frequency, for a second nothing seem to happen while they kept their sites on this pearl.
And then-... The rumble, the quakes! The cadaver was cut in two by a tooth, a sharp jagged fang, the top half getting gobbled up by a colossal 'bobbit' worm. Dragging down to the depths below to the flesh plane where it came from.
"Two good finds today~... Aren't I lucky.~"
"Look I try to keep what I think about the dude brief cuz If I don't I'll spiral into a dang angry fit because of him." he doesn't keep it brief.
Where do they even begin?
"He has this-... Need to put himself in a martyr position because he feels like he owes it to a lot of beings to give himself up to make up for whatever wrongs he'd done." Holds their beak thinking, having it split in half right down the middle of his face. Frowning in detestment.
"This fucker don't!- He doesn't have to, and what makes me so... So livid is that if he weren't around to see me toss in those bodies into the maw door, he'd probably still be wondering what the fuck he has done to have me go after him. At all! He might not even have made this deal of ours if he didn't see that shit!"
He's playing a damn hero. Him and his stupid hero complex!
"And you know what's fucky about that?? About this deal of ours? It's a mutual hostage situation! I can't do shit and he can't do anything either, the fucker's trying to buy some time so he could find out shit about me and how to get rid of me I bet! I hate that I do wanna make sure he's out of this delusion that he's helping everyone by just holdin me out. Cuz Kssh-... there's a shit ton of us knoxonk out in the world doing what I do, maybe even worse! It's useless and that irks me to no end!"
This is just the surface level of things he has opinions, any more they'll start ranting to himself.
Something…smells of peppermint…but the source of it eludes Bor
Starts rubbing their nose, getting increasingly irritated af, their normally soft tail tufted prickled into spines as it thrashed about. So much for paying attention to the fireworks, now they're doing everything in their power to look for the minty peppermint smell.
"Happy new year! I wish you lots of health and happiness for 2022!" Stanley beams. He offers them some office-made cookies, but was quickly interrupted by Bradley.
"Hey Bor, I got some coke and mentos! Let's create some noise and piss off the Narrator as well!!"
Oh hell yeah cookies! "Grazie Stanley! I hope the new year would give you much of the same if not plentiful!" The demon was just about to reach for some of those yummy treats, but had to back their claws away for a second to not hurt Bradley coming directly in front of their claws. It's okay this is why they got three other hands!
"HAH!!" Bor cawed out a laugh! making the Narrator's day the worst sounds like the best thing to do to end the year.~ "Yes please!! Maybe we can flood the piping with a shit ton of orbees!~ " they bring up 10 pounds of orbees, already know what they're planning to head to the bathrooms to flush most of it all down .~
"Might I ask you not to fiddle with that?" She only left the room for a moment, and already she could see they were about to start messing with her work, right after she had just finishing dismantling her rifle and set out all of its parts categorically for cleaning. Curiosity was one thing, something she encouraged even, but she had a system that was not to be trifled with, crossing her arms with a finger tap, tapping away at her bicep.
"If you want me to explain what various parts are and what they're for, all you need do is ask. And perhaps exercise a little more patience before rutting through other people's things." (Luna)
The demon couldn't help but want to nudge this thing she dismantled. Never really the one for guns themselves but finding it taken it apart like this was very interesting. A bunch of bits and bobs, it's both intriguing and tedious... Why own something that you gotta disassemble all the time just to clean it?
A claw was just about to poke and pick up some tiny, yet important item before Luna caught them red-handed.
"AH!" They jolted up and stood up straight, with their claws holding themselves together. Bor smiled apologetically while taking a step away from the rifle. "I'm sorry Miss Luna! uh-? It's uhm- I don't-...." they unheld their hand and gave it a quick wave, "I'm tryin to say 'yes'! If that's not too much to ask!"
#active roachie#lunafaeris #Bor: Fine I'll leave interesting bips and bobs alone... #Bor. in their roach/fae form: -already looking through other bips and bobs again-