#cw medication Tumblr posts

  • zet-sway
    28.05.2022 - 7 hours ago

    For years I've had a very painful tooth that had to be removed. As of yesterday it's finally gone and I'm so happy it's finally over C:

    #even one day after surgery it hurts less than before #yay#cw surgery#cw teeth#cw medical#zet things
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  • annikasevenshots
    28.05.2022 - 9 hours ago

    cozy saffi (and friends) imagines for bad sick days ❤️‍🩹

    ...it's for me i'm having the bad sick day

    space mom raffi bringing you tea and calling in sick for you because you're too wrecked to even talk.

    cat of choice (grudge, spot, lizard pi, aslan president of the confurderation) curled up on your chest.

    dozing off while curled up in the back of seven's ranger shuttle with a blanket draped over you as she brings you to the nearest starbase hospital. it's a smooth ride and you're lulled to sleep by the quiet rumbling all around you.

    lying in a hammock (with antigrav stabilisers because otherwise you'd throw up from the rocking) on raffi's porch (with an eye mask on to block out the light because it hurts your head). listening to spanish guitar coming from a record player somewhere far away. feeling the gentle warmth of the desert sun, dappled by her vines and suncatchers, barely dance across your skin.

    laris letting you sneak into picard's office for a nap on his couch. you aren't able to make it to the guest rooms because this chateau is too big and you're too wrecked to move any further.

    lying in the voyager sickbay listening to the beep boops of medical devices as you rest after the doctor gives you a hypospray. he hums the tune to "that old black magic" as he works quietly around you.

    you vaguely hear seven checking in on you in the la sirena sickbay. you're on the border of consciousness. her voice sounds muffled, as does the emh's, but you know she's there. you start to fall asleep, feeling a little safer.

    #saffi#imagines#writing#semi personal #seven of nine #raffi musiker#the doctor #emergency medical hologram #laris #see also: my feeble attempt to make myself feel better because i can't even stumble to the bodegas for gatorade or whatever #meds are wack #bad sick day #cw hospital #cw vomit mention
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  • just-a-girl-with-a-pistol
    28.05.2022 - 10 hours ago

    Uh I made an OC animatic in 5 days........... yeah i spedrun that shit, and since you can see this you decided not to block the CW tags, have fun? Oh song link (x) David is a funky creature

    #original character#oc#oc animatic#uh yeaaahhh#cw: violence#cw: death#cw: gore#cw: medical #cw: human experiments #cw: implied overdose #Medical Anomaly #uh yeah basically this shit is weird #have funnnn? technically? #idk if this can be fun but it was fun to make #aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa pain
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  • fictionkinfessions
    28.05.2022 - 11 hours ago

    I feel disconnected (if that's even the right word for it) because I feel only a few people know about this source and probably none of them have memories of it. I miss the guy who was researching me. I knew he gave his soul so his friend can study me, but seeing his corpse...it hurts a lot each time I see it. And when his friend acted indifferent about it? I wanted to scream at him for not caring about his friend and my researcher. If only I could've kept him there until it sank in.

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  • fictionkinfessions
    28.05.2022 - 13 hours ago

    I REALLY need to stop thinking about Susie and the Haltmann company in general because while YES I want kin memories I do NOT want to remember what it was like to be turned into that robot. It was one of the worst things to happen to me and THAT IS SAYING SOMETHING! -MK

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  • fictionkinfessions
    28.05.2022 - 17 hours ago

    I don't think anyone even tried to guess me last time so. You know what, we'll do it again but on easy mode apparently. And add a couple for more easiness.

    1 (from first time) Marry my childhood sweetheart, tragedy hits. Vampires. Watch my son grow up. More tragedy. Raise my grandson. Guess what. Guess freaking what. Except he didn't die, but it's the same shit over and over again. That was my life.

    2. Oh no I am a vampire TV salesman. But I'm dad!!! I wanna be dad!! What do you mean that's stealing, it's found family. I found them, I made them family. My kids now. Why is your truck full of wooden stakes?

    3. Look, technically I have a doctorate and okay it does sound like a silly field but hear me out. I'm right and this is awesome and admittedly a little scary, but that's the thrill of the job. The job is the point of the source though. Literally the name of the source. I'm the one portrayed as a massive goofball- which I am, but still- but I do get my moments! They show I've earned my credentials, however uh, unconventional those may be. Excitable and trying my best! When paired up with my bespectacled bestie, we can do ANYTHING.

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  • notfromcold
    28.05.2022 - 18 hours ago

    Oh. Now I'm having emotions about Stede trying to comfort an injured Ed while Roach does his thing. And Ed being like "You know I'll be fine on my own."

    And Stede just says "I know" and takes his hand anyway.

    And Ed is internally just like "what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck 🥰🥰"

    #ofmd#injury cw #ED DESERVES TO FEEL CHERISHED #medical cw
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  • notfromcold
    28.05.2022 - 18 hours ago

    Roach's bedside manner is one of the funniest parts of OFMD for me. The man is technically skilled (maybe.... probably?) but FAR too gleeful. It literally never stops being funny.

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  • all-my-friends-were-glorious
    28.05.2022 - 19 hours ago

    You should relax (tweek)

    [ Tweek ]

    “Have you ever tried to relax?! It’s a Goddamned paradox! You think about relaxing, you want to do it, but you can’t because it’s impossible! I have done everything I can to try and relax, the only thing that kind of works is the fidget spinners and meditation. Craig h-helps, too, and... A-and Stan. But I don’t know wh-what to do about that.” 

    As he spoke, his words began to devolve into stuttering. The medication was working well enough to let him speak, but he was still a vibrating mess.

    “Tr-trust me, I w-w-want to f-feel calm. I ha-ha-ha-hate being like this.”

    #La Bokka De Lä Cokka  (Tweek Tweak) #This Time It's The Last Dance So Come On By Will Alone We Set Our Minds In Motion (Tweek and Scott - Bigbadwolfletthegamesbegin) #cw mental illness #cw medication#cw paradox
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  • achilleean
    27.05.2022 - 20 hours ago

    once I’m fully recovered from the titty chop I’m gonna be the most insufferable lee/switch and generally cuddly bitch

    #cw medical #operation was yesterday!! it went well!! #currently in a moderate amount of pain which is to be expected #but other than that recovery is p smooth so far :D #send good vibes for that continuing <3 #finn rambles
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  • milkbloodheat
    27.05.2022 - 21 hours ago

    the devils jaeger (1)

    warnings: explicit sexual content, medical kink, dubious consent, period-typical sexism, doctor/patient, grisha is not a good doctor in this one

    synopsis: dark!victorian au where mikasa works as the maid for the wealthy and mysterious jaeger family after the untimely death of carla. this is the first part which features grisha/mikasa but the primary focus of future drabbles will be eremikazeke.

    wc: 3.7k

    The ad was nondescript because the Jaeger family needed no introduction. Mikasa saw it on her way to church one day. It had been one week before her eighteenth birthday, which meant she was eight days away from being homeless. She’d been looking everywhere for a job, but Shigansina was an economically depressed area and there wasn’t much in the way of employment to speak of. 

    The Jaeger family’s mansion had covered Shigansina in shadow for a couple hundred years or so. They were the wealthiest people in town, having arrived from Marley with untold riches. They kept to themselves for the most part and it had caused terrible rumors to spread about that. Well, that, and the untimely demise of any woman who stepped through the doors. 

    The latest Jaeger wife had died a few months back. Her name had been Carla and she had lasted longer than all of the others, almost twenty five years. She had been preceded by Dina Fritz, who’d only lasted a decade or so. The orphanage forbade its children from getting close to the manor, especially at night, and Mikasa had heard that the three men (the father Grisha and sons, Zeke and Eren) had been the only ones in attendance at Madame Jaeger’s funeral.

    The end was simple, written in an elegant hand. “Wanted: a woman’s touch,” it read in large letters. Her eyes drifted downard, where she found a short description. “The Jaeger Family is in need of a live-in maid and housekeeper to maintain our home in the absence of a wife. Please inquire at the manor door and ask to speak to Dr. Jaeger.”

    Dr. Jaeger had been more handsome than she expected. More quiet too. When she was deposited at the door of his study by their butler, he rose to greet her, even though she was a poor girl who wore dresses with holes around the collar.

    “Your name is Mikasa?” he had asked her, his voice edged with a deep vibrato, and it made her heart flutter a little, to feel his eyes on her. Despite all the slander that had adhered itself to the Jaeger family’s name, no one could deny that the men who bore it were handsome. She shifted uneasily beneath this gaze before giving him a small nod. For some reason, her shyness seemed to soften him, and he smiled at her. 

    “It’s almost as beautiful as you are,” he said, as if it was nothing, and her heart caught in her throat like a knife. Her surprise, cartoonish as it was, seemed to charm him even more and he leaned in close to her, the lamplight catching on his white teeth. He was old enough to be her father, with gray collecting at his temples but there was a warmth to his eyes that stoked something inside her. No one took much notice of her, not with her pallor as pale as it was from such infrequent meals, and she didn’t know what to do under the scrutiny of his attention.

    “Oh,” she said, her voice tinny like a rusted bell. “Thank you, Dr. Jaeger.”

    “So, you’ve come about the ad?”

    She nodded once more, pulling it from her bag. She’d ended up skipping church to walk all the way here and sweat clung to her palms when she passed the piece of parchment to him. “I’m young but I’m good at cleaning. I live at the orphanage and ever since I was ten, I’ve been helping out with chores, cooking, dusting, keeping things tidy. I’m quiet and don’t need much.” When she first started speaking, she tried her best to keep her voice strong but by the time she got to the end of her sentence, it quivered terribly. 

    Dr. Jaeger smiled at her encouragingly. “How old are you?”

    “Seventeen. But I’m going to be eighteen in a week.”

    “The ad stated that we aren’t just looking for a housekeeper or a cook…”

    She quickly cut in, worried that she’d said the wrong thing. “I know, you said you need a woman’s touch. I might be young but I…” Panic gripped at her throat, pushing her words out of her mouth rapidly. “They’re going to kick me out of the orphanage soon and I have nowhere to go.”

    Dr. Jaeger made a soft, sad sound. To her surprise, he reached out for his hands. His were far softer than hers, the palms of someone who had never had to make their living with their hands. “What happened to your parents, dear?”

    “They were killed by thieves. I was only spared because I was an infant then. I guess they couldn’t stomach stabbing a babe.”

    He soothed his thumb from the outside of her pinky to the bird bones of her wrist. “How horrible,” he said and he did sound genuinely sorry about it. “My late wife was an orphan too. It is a heavy weight, being alone in this world. Having no one to call your own. You must be so lonely. Aren’t you, Mikasa?”

    She could feel his gaze on her, rough and catching like sandpaper. Unable to control herself, she looked up at him and he had the sort of face that she couldn’t imagine lying to. Something about the honor held in his aristocratic features, the graceful slope of his nose, the way his glasses glinted in the light.

    She blushed, turning her hands over in themselves. “I am.”

    “I’m sorry to hear that, Mikasa. Unfortunately, I’m rather lonely myself. My late wife was very dear to me. It’s been harder for me to soldier on than I expected. You know, there are some things only women are capable of. Do you know what I mean?”

    She knew she should lie but falsehood had never come easy to her. “No, Dr. Jaeger. I’m afraid I don’t.”

    “That’s alright, Mikasa. I can show you.”


    Eight days later, a carriage arrived to take Mikasa to the Jaeger Family Mansion.

    All of her earthly belongings fit in one small trunk. She didn’t tell anyone where she was going because no one asked. The ride to the Jaeger Estate was quiet and when she looked out the window, she saw the townspeople of Shigansina staring with wide eyes. It should’ve made her uneasy, but then he remembered the kindness in Dr. Jaeger’s face when she told him about what happened to her parents. The sadness that drenched his words when he talked about his wife. Besides, the weekly wage he offered her was generous, along with the promise that she’d have a whole wing of the manor to herself.

    Dr. Jaeger had explained that both of his sons also lived at the estate with him, but that they were often elsewhere. “They don’t deign to tell their father what they might be up to,” he had said and it made Mikasa’s heart swell with pity. She didn’t understand how such a good man could be so lonely.

    Similarly to the first time she visited, she was greeted at the door by the Jaeger’s butler, who then asked her to follow him . “What about my things?” she asked as she watched the estate’s other staff lift her trunk over their head like it weighed nothing. 

    “The Doctor asked that we bring you to him immediately.”

    For some reason, once the butler finished speaking, he couldn’t quite meet her eye. He led her down the hall, always a few paces ahead of her. Upon her second visit, Mikasa was struck with the grandness of the Jaeger family’s home. The entrance led into an airy atrium with wide ceilings, the walls covered in ornate molding that reminded her of the sculptures outside cathedrals, spired and intimidating as it was beautiful.

    He didn’t take her to Dr. Jaeger’s study. Instead, she followed him to a different part of the manor that seemed to be seldom used, given the dust that clung to the furniture, the sweet smell of mold that clung to the air. Mikasa made a note of every spot that might benefit from a woman’s touch, as Dr. Jaeger had described it. It was important that she made a good impression from the start; she could tell when an opportunity had come from pity rather than genuine belief.

    The butler brought her to a shut door that had an excess of light leaking out from under the doorframe. “The doctor is waiting for you,” he said, but before she could ask what exactly was to be expected of her, the door was opening and the butler disappeared as soon as Dr. Jaeger was visible, almost as if he’d been told to do so.

    “Mikasa. Lovely to see you again. I trust the journey was to your liking.”

    The doctor was just as handsome as the last time she saw him, if not more so. There was genuine warmth in his eyes as he led her into the room behind him. To her surprise, it looked more like something that would belong in the orphanage’s infirmary than in a house. Many different gas lamps lined the walls to provide sufficient lighting centralized some sort of exam stable that sat in the middle of the room. “Dr. Jaeger, what’s this about?” Mikasa asked, turning to face him. The doctor shut the door with a sharp click and, for some reason, this made her uneasy.

    “Have you ever seen a doctor?”

    She shook her head. She was wearing her only nice dress today, one without holes or stains, in a thick black fabric that she was told matched well with her hair. It had made her feel confident when she walked out the door, but now, in this strange place, being asked such a question, it made her feel like a liar, who pretended at sophistication, who lied about where she had come from. 

    “I thought as much. The medical care in this town is atrocious, especially for the poor. As a thank you to you for coming to the aid of my boys and I, I wanted to offer you an exam. As a courtesy.”

    Mikasa swallowed. Dr. Jaeger was right, she’d never been looked over by a doctor. She was a woman now, and she knew that this came with responsibilities, like seeing doctors. Besides, this was merely an extension of Dr. Jaeger’s kindness. If it weren’t for him, she’d be homeless or worse. She bowed her head out of gratitude. “Thank you, Dr. Jaeger. That’s very generous of you.”

    He smiled at her gently. “Take a seat, Mikasa,” he said, gesturing toward the table. She did as he said, uneasiness stirring in her gut at the closeness of him. He smelled like fire and dark, a richness to his scent that sent shivers down her spine. As he proceeded with the exam, he explained the purpose of every instrument and exercise to her. “This is so I can hear your heart,” he told her, when he used his stethoscope. “It’s beating so quickly, like a rabbit’s.”

     He checked her reflexes, holding each of her joints tenderly in his hands. Massaging them after he hammered at them, a softness in his gaze. “You’re doing so good, Mikasa,” he told her and his words sent shivers down her spine. She’d never been on the receiving end of so much attention before, his gaze narrowed to a pinprick, focused completely on her. When he held her face in his hand so he could use his flashlight to look down her throat, he cooed sweet words at her. “Such a pretty mouth, especially for an orphan girl.” 

    It was too much for her, her cheeks so warm he must’ve been able to feel it in his fingers. Each compliment stoked a fire deep inside her, a place that was so rarely touched that she had forgotten it existed. Once he finished examining her neck and leaned away from her, she let out a soft sigh of disappointment. She hadn’t wanted it to end. 

    “Alright, Mikasa. For the next part, I’ll need you to take off your clothes.”

    “W-what?” she stammered out. 

    Dr. Jaeger gave her another gentle smile. “So I can examine the rest of your body. Since you’ve never been looked at before, it’s best to be thorough.”

    “Oh,” she said, suddenly feeling very stupid. With trembling hands, she dutifully undid each unbutton of her dress. She’d never gotten undressed in front of a man before, the dormitories at the orphanage had been divided by sex. Dr. Jaeger wasn’t looking at her, instead putting away the implements he’d used to check her over and gathering others, and she found herself wanting him to. Hoping that he’d call these parts of her beautiful, like he had with the others. 

    “Your chemise and drawers too.”

    She opened her mouth for a moment to question him, but then remembered how stupid she felt when he had told her that all of this was a routine part of a medical exam. So, she let her garments fall to floor. “I’m ready,” she said, her body shaking like a leaf under the light. 

    “Good,” he said, finally turning to look at her. “Get on the table.” 

    She did as she said. She sat on its edge, her feet dangling. Dr. Jaeger was soon beside her. When he pressed his hand to her ribcage, it was cold. “You’re quite thin,” he said, drawing his fingers along the knobs of her bones. “We’ll see to it that you’re fed properly as long as you live with us.” 

    Before Mikasa could thank him, his hands moved once more and, suddenly, he was cupping her left breast. She couldn’t help but let a shriek and Dr. Jaeger caught her shoulder to hold her still.  “I’m sorry, Mikasa, are my hands too cold?” he asked, as he squeezed her breast in his hand. She gave him a little nod and he let out a sound of pity. 

    “Let me warm you up a little then.” Suddenly, the intention behind the movement of his hand seemed to change, and his touch was soft rather than clinical, caressing her skin. When his thumb brushed against her nipple, she let out another small squeak, but this one made her insides clench up in a different way, a strange feeling spreading through her. 

    “Sorry, too cold?”


    When he stopped touching her breast, she missed the sensation immediately. Something about the pressure of his touch, the friction of his skin. But before she could miss it too much, he moved to her other breast. This time, he started by touching her softly, the palm of his hand grazing her nipple as he squeezed her. 

    “Such a healthy girl,” he said as he pulled away from her. “We’re almost done. Can you lay back for me?”

    Realization dawned on Mikasa slowly as she noticed that Dr. Jaeger’s gaze was now resting on the curls between her legs. Of course, she told herself, as she leaned backward, this what was next. She was a woman now, after all, and she remembered hearing that sometimes women had to go to special doctors to get these parts to make sure that they weren’t full of sin. That must be what Dr. Jaeger was checking for, as he maneuvered himself between her spread legs. 

    “Relax, Mikasa. You’ve already been so good for me. Just a little longer,” the doctor said to her. She did her best to do as he said, trying to calm her breathing. Still, the sensations that were plaguing her body were making it hard to focus, especially when she could feel the weight of Dr. Jaeger’s gaze on her. 

    “Have you ever been touched here before?” he asked, tilting his head around her spread knees so he could look her in the eye. She shook her head, her cheeks turning bright red. The Sisters who ran the orphanage had only explained sex to her once it became clear that she was never going to be adopted at the age of fourteen. Their words had been vague, imprecise, but combining it with the crude words men yelled at her on the street whenever she went outside, she was able to piece it together. Perhaps, the only thing the Sisters had made clear to her was that if she was ever found to have dirtied herself in that way, she would be thrown onto the street.

    Dr. Jaeger’s eyes drifted back beneath her legs. “I don’t think you’re the sort to lie, but it’s important that I have this information correct. Otherwise, this whole exam will be for naught. This might feel strange.” 

    That was her only warning before she felt him spread her outer lips apart, cold air catching on her wet skin. For a few moments, he just stared at her and she couldn’t make sense of his expression, only that it stirred something in her. 

    “Doctor?” she asked, lifting her head a little. Worried that perhaps, she’d become dirty and impure without her even knowing. But Dr. Jaeger’s face was not contorted with disgust or any of the sharp-eyed ways men looked at the ladies of the night who wandered the streets of Shigansina at night. “Is everything okay?”

    “Yes, everything’s perfect. You’re perfect.”

    She came up on her elbows, confused as to how he could find any part of her body to be that interesting. With wide eyes, she watched as he pressed his fingertip into the part of her that ached terribly, the part of her that she had promised the sisters she’d never touch, and she let out a sharp, keening sound. It was like nothing she’d ever felt before, pain but sharper, more precise, flame-licked. 

    “Your hymen is still intact,” Dr. Jaeger said, but his voice was rougher than it had been before. His fingertip was still pressed against her. For some reason, she found herself pushing against it. Wanting more of it inside her. “Oh, sweetheart,” he said, his words coming out in something like a growl. “You’re getting so wet.” A peculiar pressure was building in her, pulling at her insides, making her pulse. She didn’t know what she wanted, but it hurt, not having it. 

    “Dr. Jaeger…” she tried to say but it came out as a whine.

    “Please, call me Grisha,” he said, circling her entrance with his thumb. 

    “Grisha,” she begged, unsure of what she was asking for, only that she needed it desperately. “Please.”

    “Please what?”

    “Make it stop.”

    “Make what stop?”

    She let out a frustrated little sigh. Not having the words to describe what was happening to her as he continued to tease her hole. “Make it stop hurting,” she finally managed, tears of exasperation stinging at her eyes. Whatever embarrassment she once felt at being bare in front of this man has been replaced with some sort of heat-born sickness, making her writhe against his touch. 

    “Oh, sweet girl. You’ve never come before, have you?”

    She shook her head, catching her lip between her teeth. Dr. Jaeger – no, Grisha – chokes out a pained sound. “Let me show you,” he said, and, then, he moved his finger away from where she wanted it most but before she could complain about it too much, he was touching a new part of her, closer to the apex of her thighs. “Oh!” she cried out as sharp darts of pleasure pulled at her gut, making her hips twitch. 

    “That’s your clitoris, Mikasa. If you or someone else touches it, it will make you feel good. Like this.”

    Pleasure, like nothing she’d ever felt before, trembled through Mikasa’s body as Grisha continued to rub at that spot between her legs. He was slow and gentle, gathering her wetness on his fingers to smooth against her clit. With every circle of his wrist, Mikasa felt herself getting wetter, her cunt getting tighter. A distinct feeling of emptiness that begged to be filled. 

    But Grisha never gave her what she wanted, no matter how close to her entrance he got. She could feel his eyes on her, fixed with a scrutiny that makes her feel impossibly hot. And, every single time, he seemed to get closer but then thought better of it. Each time, it hurt even worse, making her thump her fists against the table in frustration. 

    “Oh, sweet girl. You’re so eager, aren’t you?” As he spoke, he rubbed a tight circle around her entrance that made her cry out, sharp and keening. “I wish I could give you what you want. But that wouldn’t be right…” He trailed off and she saw his forehead wrinkle with concentration. Almost as if he was weighing his options. “But I can take some of that ache away. How about that?”

    “Please,” she warbled, pressing herself against his hand. Then, almost like he knew her body inside out, he set to the task with an efficiency and accuracy that astonished her. Pressing his thumb firmly against her clit, one of his long fingers tracing the seam of her. The tease alone was enough and, suddenly, she was coming apart, pleasure crashing over her like a brutal wave, pulling her under something dark and totaling.

     If she didn’t taste them in her mouth, she would not believe the sounds she was making, how many of them were mixed with Dr. Jaeger’s first name. How he kept up the pressure on her clit, whispering soft words of praise as he stared at her like she was made of holy light. 

    “There you go, Mikasa. Feel better?” he asked, once her body fell still and her mouth went quiet. Her body rested limply against the table, almost like all the bones had been pulled out of her, turning her into a ragdoll. Moving felt strange, like she was stuck in honey. 

    “M’tired,” she murmured drowsily, her eyes flickering closed. But then Dr. Jaeger began to clean between her legs with some sort of cloth. Overstimulation made her hiss, her nails catching on the metal of the table. 

    “Sorry, dear. Just one moment. You did so good. You deserve to be clean.”

    The warmth in his voice calmed her. And, without meaning to, she found herself falling asleep. 

    When she wakes, she’s in a grand bedroom, wearing a nightgown she’s never seen before, Dr. Jaeger’s touch branded onto her skin. 

    #drabbles #the devils jaeger #mikasa ackerman x grisha jaeger #cw: dubious consent #cw: medical kink #cw: age difference #aot smut
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  • lonelybruises
    27.05.2022 - 23 hours ago

    anyone have experience talking effexor/venlafaxine and lamictal/lamotrigine together? I’m on both right now (third week) and I kinda feel like if a wet cement slab could feel angry and sleep deprived

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  • fearthecoldblood
    27.05.2022 - 1 day ago

    are you really sick in the uk if a family member doesn’t suggest lucozade as a cure

    #cw medical #my head is fucked idk if lucozade will fix this #yeah sure some ginger will help
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  • echovoidsystem
    27.05.2022 - 1 day ago

    im very Moist rn

    #echos#meds tw#meds cw #i have like three separate medications that are in the form of a gel/cream/ointment #and i just had to apply all three at once #so now I'm Moist in like three separate places and also i can't take a shower tonight wait why didn't i think to take a shower before this #well I'm an idiot #an idiot with very hydrated skin ig
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  • courtofmuses
    26.05.2022 - 1 day ago

    It’s been a rough couple of days mentally and emotionally. Every time I see a doctor they give me more bad/scary news. My gastro doctor has now referred me to a hepatologist at a university hospital because he feels like I need a team of more specialized doctors for whatever’s going on with me. It’s really quite terrifying and I just hope it’s not as bad as my brain is making it out to be. 

    I see the rheumatologist in the morning so I’m braced for more crappy news. I’m not a doctor, obviously, but somehow in my bones I know this is an issue I’m going to have to deal with the rest of my life and that’s a little scary too. All the professionals I’ve seen so far seem very confident that the issue is autoimmune, which could potentially be causing the issues with my liver. 

    I just want to figure this out so I know what I’m dealing with. Luckily, being on here and able to write with all of you really beautiful people is a great distraction so thanks for sticking around. <3

    #experiment 626 speaking (ooc) #medical tw #mental health tw #medical cw #mental health cw
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  • the-sappho-of-lesbos
    26.05.2022 - 1 day ago

    CW body image / eating disorder / weight / medication

    I always thought I’d be okay with having medication as long as the side affect wasn’t weight gain. And I mean even with this Clonidine apparently there is a small chance so I’m freaking out about that for the weigh in on this Sunday. But also it’s making me think should I just have tried the Abilify. But it has serious weight gain and I can’t handle that at all. Then I was thinking maybe I should just try Fluvoxamine or maybe have it with my fluoxetine. See if that does anything. But you know I don’t really know much about medication so my googling of things isn’t making it much clearer. But the psychiatrist here said the best medication for OCD is Clomipramine. And she went through the Google results with me and explained how even though it says there is a small change of weight gain she hasn’t had anyone complain of it and that it isn’t like a significant statics and what means and how it doesn’t impact you.

    But I just couldn’t stop thinking well it’ll be me. I’ll be the one to gain weight. And I can’t handle that. Because even like 1-2kg and I’ll be out of my comfort weight and I won’t cope at all. And I keep thinking about what the psychiatrist said yesterday and it’s messing with my head and I don’t know what to do.

    I just feel so trapped. Like I’ll never get better without medication but I’m not well enough to cope with the medication options available. And I just DONT want to deal with my ED. in my head dealing with my ED means gaining weight and I just can’t handle that.

    I just don’t know what to do. I’m not handling the side effects of Clonidine well. I hate how dry it’s making it me and I am so worried it’s going to ruin my skin. Or make me gain weight. But I won’t know about that until Sunday.

    I don’t know I just feel like I’m going in circles and I don’t have a way out because every option is going to hurt me in a way I’m not ready for. And that scares me. I’ve had psychiatrists say well just try the medication and if you gain weight you can go off it and loss the weight again. But it’s not that simple for me. I don’t want to be that weight. If I’m not in the 45kg range I freak out. I get to 46 and my alarm bells start going off to fix it quick. I get into the 47 and I’m having a melt down. I just can’t handle it. And it hate it. Because I just feel like there is no way out of this.

    And I know it’s probably my OCD making everything worse but then I start fixating on my differential diagnosis list and just my general diagnosis list and I’m like am I lying. Have I just tricked everyone. What if I don’t have this. What if I’m just being a baby. What if I’m not even mentally ill. Or I’m not even that badly mentally ill and I’m just lazy and just want to cruise through life on the DSP. What if I’m manipulating everything. I start to feel so detached from myself and my personhood and it gets all blurry. Like I don’t know who I am. Or everything I’ve ever done or said has been a lie or just me tricking people or trying to manipulate them into thinking I’m a good person.

    I don’t know I just feel so tired and trapped and over this. It’s like I can’t give myself a way out because I’m too stubborn and I hate it.

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  • flannelshirtandjeans
    26.05.2022 - 2 days ago

    Wyatt may be 20 and understand what's happening a lot better than a kid kid, but he's still just a kid who's scared and worried for his mom. And also a cuddlebug. Norma appreciates the cuddles - it's a comfort win-win!

    (Sometimes he has to make room for other people and will do that without complaint, he's not HOGGING this time xD)

    #medical cw#blood cw #kinda? implied? bc of the (likely incorrectly placed asdhhkajsd) wires #wyatt epping#norma epping#my art
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  • snarp
    26.05.2022 - 2 days ago

    Both the devices which I ordinarily use to self-administer my nightly regimen of cannabinoid anti-inflammatories are presently Fucked, and have been so since the day before Dad was hospitalized, leaving me full of lesions, swollen joints, and brainfog, and thereby rendering my hands too shaky to do the necessary cleaning/refilling/part replacements. NEVER put off weed vape maintenance.

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  • callalilycas
    26.05.2022 - 2 days ago

    someday im gonna be rich enough to buy the see double you and implant my leftist agenda and then youll all see

    #the cw#cw#supernatural#funny #i am on pain medication right now in case you couldn’t tell
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  • pugswithlasers
    26.05.2022 - 2 days ago

    oh so the feeling of “pill stuck in your throat” isn’t supposed to be accompanied with a burning sensation and sertraline just gives you heartburn sometimes for some fucking reason. cool. cool. was anyone going to tell me that

    #i have been on this medication since i was TEN YEARS OLD #and i legit thought 'oh that's what happens when you take pills wrong :)' and no one corrected me #asdofuhsldhgsdgl;fg#cw medication
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