I thought I'd make everyone's lives a little more bearable since I'm posting so much about hockey and I turned it into a short blurb. I tried to keep this under 1000 words and came out at 938 so it still counts.
Suffer with me.
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It was supposed to be a friendly game, something to stop the arguments during the world meetings. But Norway knew it wouldn't be. They took their sport too seriously. He sits on a log, legs crossed in front of him, as he inspects his nails boredly. "Aren't you going to play?" Iceland asks him skeptically.
"No," Norway answers in an indifferent tone. "I'm here to watch ass, not fall on my own."
Iceland rolls his eyes as he finishes tying his skates and goes to the edge of the lake. He's playing as one of three referees for the game. It's a three-on-three game, mostly just because no one really wants to get involved in the rivalry. America, Canada, and Russia on one team against Finland, Denmark, and Sweden. Norway isn't sure that Denmark is the best choice, but he's just here to watch. Like hell he's going to get in Finland's way -- or worse, have to play instead.
Iceland takes his place across from Belarus, and Poland gets ready for the face-off between Canada and Finland. It's Russia and Sweden in net, Denmark and America as defensemen. No one on the ice looks like they intend this to be a friendly game. "Ready to get your ass kicked?" Canada asks, glancing up at Finland.
"Eat ice," Finland replies, focused on his stick.
Poland drops the puck and the game goes into full swing. Watching from the sidelines, Norway follows the puck from one side of the ice to the other. He's not the only spectator. Germany and Prussia are on the other side, and Spain has dragged Austria along to see what the big deal is. At first, the game is almost boring -- no one is scoring, everyone is playing nice. And then Finland gets called for high sticking. "What are you talking about?" he tries to argue as Iceland attempts to bully him to the edge of the lake to sit by Norway. "That's crazy!"
"Finland, you hit America in the face with your stick while making eye contact with him," Iceland informs him, unimpressed. "That is definitely high sticking. And that's a two minute penalty."
Swearing in a mix of about three languages, Finland sits beside Norway, tapping his stick against the ground in frustration. Norway moves further down the log to make sure he doesn't accidentally get hit. Now is the time to see how well Denmark can hold up against Canada and America, and no one is surprised when they make a goal within the first minute. Sweden looks more than a little peeved, though. Finland turns to Norway and, through gritted teeth, asks, "Are you sure you don't want to play?"
Norway doesn't look over at him. "I'm sure. I'm perfectly fine here, watching."
Grumbling to himself, Finland turns back to the game, counting down the seconds. Belarus barely manages to wave him back in before he's on the ice again. In retaliation, within five minutes, he manages to get the puck past Russia and evens the game out. Things get more intense, and Norway can hear Austria getting more interested and excited, making Spain laugh. The next penalty is on Canada, who trips Denmark, and the game is stalled for a solid three minutes while he argues with Iceland and Poland over the call before he finally hauls himself off the ice.
America manages to hold his own, but gets a penalty for hooking shortly after Canada gets back on the ice and another argument ensues. If there were more players, Poland probably would have pulled Canada for all the arguing he's doing. Finland, picking himself back up, looks nothing short of smug. If there's one thing that he's good at when it comes to this game, it's definitely riling everyone else up so they make mistakes. America throws his stick aside when Denmark makes a goal.
The highlight of the game isn't when Finland and Canada start throwing punches (because that felt inevitable), but when Sweden and Russia both get into it in center ice after Finland ended up sprawled in the net behind Russia. There's a little bit of confusion, and then Denmark and America end up serving the penalties for their goalies, both of them more than a little annoyed. They only take a break halfway through the game, in which both Finland and Canada can be clearly heard venting all their frustrations. When they get back on, America manages to tie the game. "Who's going to win, do you think?" Spain asks Norway.
Without looking up, Norway replies, "Not my idiots." He can already see it -- Finland is getting more frustrated and Denmark is floundering a bit. The mistakes that happened in the next half were predictable to Norway. And, just as he'd expected, those mistakes cost them the game. Although, Sweden did an amazing job compensating for his teammates and so, despite getting an impressive 20 shots on goal (that Norway counted), Canada only got one last goal in to take the lead.
By the time the game ends, Poland looks as though he'd like to stop arguing and actually punch someone, and Iceland skates off in a huff. Oh, it's going to be a long night of Finland breaking down the game and talking about how unfair the game had gone, with Sweden nodding his approval. Denmark will be hidden away somewhere, sulking, and dealing with that will be fun, too. Norway grimaces as he watches Canada, America, and Russia celebrate while Finland attempts to break the ice with his stick.
There's no such thing as a friendly game of hockey between Canada and Finland.