I know I haven't been very active on tumblr for a while. I'm going through a lot right now. For one, I'm still battling my ED and winning most days. And it's hard to battle that while dealing with PTSD and flashbacks and the stress of going into full disability even though all I want is to go back to work and take care of myself.
I was finally doing a little better financially too, i saved up 236 euros so far and was slowly climbing out of poverty step by step.
And then my cat had to go to the vet. Just for his anual vaccination, but it turns out his teeth are really bad and need to be fixed. Which means he'll have to go under anesthesia. He's 10 years old and seems okay but the vet wants to do a blood test (110 euros) to make sure.
The actual teeth cleaning is at least (if no xrays have to be made, which I don't thinks so tbh, one tooth may need to be pulled from what I can see) 140 euros, a full dental xray is 50 euros.
You know where this is going.
I had money saved up, I will have none left and then some.
Thankfully my parents are giving me some birthday money so I may come out of this better than expected but still. It's very scary.
I want my cat, my esa to be okay and healthy.
I want to be able to go back to work and earn an actual living.
I want to go back to school, go into the field of nutrition. I even picked out my next training and education in a flurry of hope.
I just want to be able to live my life and not be stuck in this loop of poverty and hellscape.