I wish I knew how to communicate what I am trying to explain to people… Sometimes I just can’t find the right words to help them understand me… 😔 Felling trapped inside 🥺
Sometimes, I find it hard to move on and achieve my own goals.
On those days, I chose to take a break, smoke a J and analyze life and my choices.
"It's gonna be okay", I say to myself. "I have to stay motivated, so I don't die out here."
And, it really does get better. Maybe the J does help, but most times, I think it is the self reflections. It's okay to take a break, rather than give up.
I would rather take time to understand what I am doing rather than assume and lie to myself that I know it all or that I do not need help.
It's okay to ask for help, you cannot handle everything on your path by yourself.
All the time, you need love. All the time, we need support.
So on this day, take some minutes to take a break, breath, reflect and analyze life.
"Understanding is Key, it builds common sense."
-NaddiieeIsMink!..x
My love 💞 slept over with me for a second time & I got to wake up to his beautiful face and soul ✨ when he came over it was nighttime 🌙 & we walked to the park near my house 🏠 as usual & smoked a lil blunt 🍃 we were sitting underneath the slide 🛝 & as he’s about to light the blunt 🍃 he says. “Yo if I see a spider 🕷 I’m going to 🔪 myself” haha he’s me so I was thinking 💭 the same. We are one 🌎 consciousness 🧠.
Anyways, he took pictures of me on my phone 📱 lol .. we start walking 🚶♀️🚶♂️ back home and I’m super shy 🙈 still because we just started dating 🍝 & he’s like (I’m like cuz again we are one) “you’re not gonna hold my hand 🖐? & I grab hold his hand ✋🏼 haha so we get home and yk what we make love 💕 while the tv 📺 was playing 🎮 after that we knocked 🛌
The morning 🌞 arrives ⬆️ & I say good morning ☀️ to my handsome 😍 baby 👶🏾 & I go on top 🔝 of him and hug 🫂 him & he’s like “good morning I love you” i said “I Love You Too” *no we didn’t kiss because our breath reeked 🤢 lol even he said his 2* I know this sounds nasty 🤮 but whatever 🙄 we were high ☁️ as hell 🔥 so we didn’t brush our teeth 🪥 that night lol 😆 anyways, i was getting horny 🦦 so i was grinding on him 💃🏼 but then I actually got tired 🥱 and he went down to give me 👩🏼🦱✋🏼 🐱
Then I fed him breakfast 🥞 but his fine ass followed me to the kitchen to watch me cook 👩🍳 but im too shy once again and I will fuck up ⬆️ his breakfast 🍳 if he’s watching 👀 me so I told him that 🗣 he was recording me lol 😆 & sent it to his group chat with his friends 👯♂️ he kisses 😘 me and says “okay fine” and walks 🚶🏽 back to my room 🪱
I bring his handsome😍 ass his breakfast 🍳 & i already knew I fucked 🆙 because he wanted to make me nervous 😟 lol 😆 so brought that bit and lowkey ran 🏃🏼♀️ anyways I made him his (our) fav breakfast 🍳 bacon 🥓 and eggs 🍳 😍 lol with melted cheese 🧀 on the eggs btw 😋 so yeah I told him I already know 🧠 that shit finna be ass 🍑 he was like “nah it’s good” like yeah sure do yk im you and you’re me Ik you’re lying lol 😆
Skip to the point 🧵 my baby 👶🏾 went to go smoke à blunt 🍃 at the park while I took a shower 🚿 and when I got out of the shower 🚿 he was already back 😍 so I opened the door 🚪 for him & he comes into my room 🪱 with his hands behind his back 👀 and he goes “here “ and guess what it is 😍 a beautiful pink flower he got for me on the way back next door 🥹 he’s so sweet I was so surprised 😲 because no man has ever loved me for me the way my twin flame ❤️🔥 does he accepts 🫶🏼🫱🏻🫲🏼 me for me and that’s enough for him 😍💞 but little did he know brain 🧠 he’s the gift 🎁 himself 🧑🏽
There’s more ➕ to this story 📖 but I just love him 😍🫶🏼 you guys should really invest in seeing God 🌞 as your ultimate lover 💞 this is called harmonious union with God and him only 🌞 “attachment is deeped seeded fear”~ Jeff and Shaleia (my gurus who helped me with my union they literally saved us)
Also beware of the fake information you guys look at about twin flames that are literally keeping you from being together with them🫶🏼. If you really want TRUTH take a look at Jeff and Shaleia. They spoke to my heart. Hopefully you don’t invest in a soulmate lol 👎🏼 they are not your eternal partner. Your twin flame is ❤️🔥. Separation is an illusion. You are one 🌎 with your ultimate lover 💞 also check out Jeff and Shaleia’s book called “twin flames: finding your ultimate lover” so healing !!
The movie “the notebook” is a perfect example of what twin flames are 💞 they are twin flames in the movie !!
You are worthy of the love 💞 that you seek 👀 This boy is not my twin flame ❤️🔥 because I say so, he is my twin flame because I detached myself from him being my twin he just *is* by experience and doing the inner work. Plus I know who I am, I am clear on my desires and he reflects all of them 😍 he *is* me.
Please stop misinterpreting the word soul mate with twin flame these are two COMPLETELY different things. Plus soulmate relationships are so leaky and draining after you start seeking a true long lasting partner and that is your twin flame. YOU CAN HAVE THIS TOO. Everyone has a twin flame.
"Something about this weird sense of absence—this sense of the existential reality of non-existence—resembled the paralyzing fear you might feel when you climb to the very top of a high steeple. This connection between hunger and acrophobia was a new discovery for me."
good god i scheduled an advising meeting for the fulbright grant tomorrow and am realizing i am massively out of my depth.
“ The concept of surrender is important in every area of your life. When you surrender EVERYTHING to God, you literally never have to worry. About anything… Make every decision from your heart center and not your mind… Darkness works through our minds… As I grew up, I learned the difference between heart and emotions. I learned how the heart center receives input from God which is not emotional attachment which comes from ego, not the heart… the mind is useless in making a decision because it has no way to interpret whether the data it receives is from God or from darkness… the mind was helpful AFTER the decision was made… but it should not be involved in the decision itself.”
Abridged.
All text quoted from @ Liana Shanti on IG (her stories)
My photo - taken in Virginia Beach, VA, 2021
self: stay tech-free in the bedroom, and allow yourself to wake up without screen time. make your bed, take the time to journal or meditate even just for 5-10 minutes
move: exercise if you can and try a few simple morning stretches each day, stretching is beneficial for both your mental and physical wellbeing
fuel: nourish your body for the day ahead, drink a glass of water first, and then your favorite breakfast. whether that be a proper meal or something on the go. don't forget your supplements too
prepare: get ready for the day ahead, check your to-do list, and schedule and set any alarms or reminders you might need. if you find it helpful and productive you can also check your emails.
Every time I open up to my mother and she thinks she hears “fighting words” she just leaves bc she thinks we’re gonna end up yelling when. I was never going to yell and then complains that I never open up
I’m gonna start recording our conversations so that she can see when she just melts into shouting and defensiveness when I’m completely calm and trying to discuss things with her so that she can see
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The wrong people are dying.
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Comments added today.
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Music: Spirit Blossom
Musician: RomanBelov
URL: https://pixabay.com/music/-spirit-blossom-15285/
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i. guess the reason i watched so much trashy anime in high school was bc i watched so much anime in the first place. and if you wanna watch shows about high schoolers then eventually you’re gonna have to watch the trashy stuff (not to mention i like girls sooooo so so much). but i wanted to watch something romance-y and rompy so i’m watching rent-a-girlfriend bc i’ve heard good things abt it being fun and an interesting look at relationships and pretending and satisfaction etc and i’ll give it and my high school self credit in that this is super fun. unfortunately though so far any interesting commentary it could be giving through all the different times of girls in its cast is super overshadowed by how badly it wants you to hate every single girl except the main one
sometimes you realise a little late that love is not the only thing responsible for your growth and its okay!
We don’t lose what is meant for us.
We lose who was blocking our what was meant for us.
it is poetic, feeling this way.
but not in the way you’d hope.
in the way that I am just trying to make sense of why and how I got here.
poetic justification for the broken human being I am.
poetic reasoning as to why I want to lock myself away and stare until everything is blurry and I feel nothing.
poetic clarification as to what made me feel like I will never amount to the standards of not only myself, but others.
it’s quite beautiful to read in a book, but it’s ugly to endure in reality.
and maybe that’s what helps me cope, pretending that it’s a beautiful thing-
-to hate myself
